Friday, July 11, 2014

2 Questions I've Been Asked Regarding Divorce?

Hi there!

Many of you know that I wrote a multi-post series entitled "Wanna Save Your Marriage" in the fall of 2013. I received some feedback.  A little good, a little bad.  The good feedback was fairly general and the bad was mostly from one person, though there are certainly others who would disagree.  This person is close in that they are family.  However, we only keep in touch here and there so I did not know that this person was going through a very recent separation at the time.  They were very sensitive to my challenges regarding scriptures stance on divorce and fighting for your marriage.  Their response came to the first post of the series.  I have no idea if they read any of the others which may have clarified some things.  

It would not have changed what I said, because I was not striving to beat up anyone and I made that very clear in that first post.  I also cannot avoid this topic because it may be offensive.  I still felt bad though and wondered why someone who is a professing Christian and who is going through a separation that their spouse was pursuing, not themselves, would be so angry with me for pursuing truth in relationship to the biblical marriage commitment.  You would have thought they would want me to encourage others to try hard to avoid what they were going through.  Still, separation hurts and creates fear of divorce because that is usually where it leads.  Since then I have been asked a couple of questions by someone in a similar circumstance that got me thinking.  Maybe, somewhere in the recesses of their minds these thoughts were turning.  I don't know?

Two Questions, Two Thoughts
This next person knew that I read the bible, believed the bible, and was trying to live it out.  Consequently they sought me out to ask me a couple of questions about their situation.  One, "had they done everything they could to fight for their marriage and were they justified in leaving their spouse?"  Two, "were they going to go to hell for it?"  I thought, "Wow, here is someone who is actually seeking biblical truth in response to their marital trials."  They were also kind of wondering if it was their fault, even though they seemed to know it wasn't.  I also made me consider a third question.  How many people perhaps wonder what God thinks if the divorce is not their fault?  What if they have done everything they can do?

These questions made me consider two thoughts to try to address.  One, "there are still people who profess Christ and are not willing to let go of their marriage without a fight, and without biblical grounds."  Two, "I need to answer these two questions more thoroughly in case anyone else in my circle of influence has had similar thoughts."  I don't know how many people actually read what I had to say about divorce and marriage but I am responsible to ensure that I don't mislead or cause unnecessary worry or guilt.

I write on this subject because it burdens me to see so many struggling in their marriages and so many not really having a proper understanding of what the bible teaches.  Marriage is not easy but it is worth it. However, if for reasons only know to God you have done everything possible and your marriage still fails I want you to understand what God expects based on scripture given certain circumstances.  I also want to make perfectly clear what causes someone to go to hell.(Hint: It's not divorce under any circumstances.)

Some of this will be similar to previous posts on the subject, some may be a little new.  However, I believe we cannot think about this too much because it is so prevalent in our day.  Destruction of the family unit is one of Satan's greatest ploys for coming against the Church of Jesus Christ. 

Short and Sweet
In the interest of desiring not to loose readers on this, I will strive to keep these short and probably post a little more frequently over the next couple of weeks.  Kind of a series concept again, like the other.  I hope that is ok.  At the end I am planning a post that speaks to the responsibility of the Church regarding divorce.

Love in Christ,

Coram Deo (Living before the face of God)


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